On her last Secret Sister episode with Sunmi, Red Velvet‘s Seulgi shared her innermost concerns about her career and asked her “Sunbae (선배, senior)” slash newfound “Unnie (언니, older sister)” for advice.
Once the two idols settled down in bed, Seulgi opened up about the uncertainty she felt about being a K-Pop idol.
“The longer I do this, the less I understand… Sometimes I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore.” — Seulgi
Seulgi admitted she had to overcome some rough patches as a trainee, and even as a rookie idol once she debuted.
“I was picked by the agency for my singing talent, but I couldn’t sing. As I watched other singers who are better than me, I began to feel insecure. Then to make things worse, I developed vocal chord issues.” — Seulgi
It was a hard time for Seulgi, who felt like she had to give up singing because she didn’t like how her voice sounded.
“I started dancing because I couldn’t bear singing anymore. I would only practice singing in a studio where no one else could hear me. That’s how much I had come to hate my voice.” — Seulgi
This made Seulgi question whether she can pursue her career as an idol singer. This insecurity had a strong impact on her character. She began to fear the stage and lose herself in doubt.
“I used to blame myself for not knowing how to do anything else. What would I be able to do other than this? I don’t even know what I like.” — Seulgi
Seulgi realized, however, she has so much more left to show. With Sunmi’s sincerest advice to trust in herself and show who she really is, Seulgi agreed that she would look harder and deeper into what will make her unique.
“Seven years I was with the agency, but no one told me that it would be okay for me to be myself. I’m working on opening new doors for myself.” — Seulgi
For Red Velvet’s “Bad Boy” promotion, Seulgi tried to style herself in a way that made her feel confident and strong. This, of course, drove the fans madly in love with the fierce and charismatic Seulgi!
Seulgi looked forward to “searching harder” to figure out who she is, what she likes and can do best.
She literally poured her heart out as she confided her deepest concerns to Sunmi.
This isn’t the first time Seulgi’s mentioned the time when she almost quit being an idol. During Idol Party, she revealed she wanted to quit after devoting years of training with SM.
“It was fun for the first 3~4 years but than I came to a slump. I doubted whether or not this path was right for me.” — Seulgi
It wasn’t just a difficult time for her, Seulgi broke down in tears as she reminisced about how hard it was on her family as well.
“I had a huge slump during the 4th and 5th year. At that time my mom got me through telling me ‘You are going to make it, there is absolutely no question about that.’ My mom later told me that that was one of the most difficult times she ever faced as well.” — Seulgi
But that’s all behind her now as she sours as one of the top K-Pop groups and continues to improve as she finds herself more and more along the way!